Lend him an ear

Dear Editor,

As the New Year rapidly approaches, I urge all citizens to get a new callendear.

Many of the old ones may be out of date. Some of the new ones will show the newly remodeled Mt. Rushmore with George W. This will weigh 10,000,000 tons (symbolizing the number of dollars spent on Iraqi democracy).

This will cause considerable physical and economic enginearing problems.

To raise the necessary funds to bail out the failing capitalists, it won't be necessary to raise taxes next ear.

The war on democracy -- er, ah, I mean terrorism -- has cost the tax payers an arm and an ear -- I mean foot.

Who will foot the bill?

If the shoe fits, wear it.

Steve Stramel,

McCook