By any other name, a tax smells the same

Tax his land, tax his wage,

Tax his bed in which he lays.

Tax his tractor, tax his mule,

Teach him taxes is the rule

The old poem by an unknown author rings true today, with states around the country scrambling to find new sources of revenue.

For the time being, Nebraska is in good shape, with a projected record cash reserve fund, but even the Cornhusker State has resorted to some of the creative tax schemes listed in a recent story by The Associated Press.

Tax his cow, tax his goat,

Tax his pants, tax his coat.

Tax his ties, tax his shirts,

Tax his work, tax his dirt

States aren't far from the measures described in the poem, although politicians are reluctant to call any new revenue stream a "tax," if possible.

For instance, Indiana and Virginia leased their toll highways and Alabama leased its toll bridges to private companies in exchange for upfront cash.

Tax his chew, tax his smoke,

Teach him taxes are no joke.

Tax his car, tax his grass,

Tax the roads he must pass

New York actually "sold" Attica prison to a state agency for $242 million to balance the budget, but that left the state with $450 million in debt including some of the debt on a prison it had already paid to build.

Now, New York is thinking about leasing its lottery to a private investor in exchange for an upfront $4 billion, $200 million in annual interest and continuation of the $2.1 billion that goes to education.

Tax his bills, tax his gas,

Tax his notes, tax his cash.

Tax him good and let him know

That after taxes, he has no dough

There's also talk of installing solar panels along roadways, erecting wind generators along the roads, and selling naming rights for rest stops.

If he hollers, tax him more,

Tax him until he's good and sore.

Tax his coffin, tax his grave,

Tax the sod in which he lays

Nebraska is actually ahead of the creative taxation curve, having for a number of years required the purchase of tax stamps for illegal drugs. The only people who purchase the stamps are collectors, of course, but failure to pay the tax gives prosecutors another charge to apply against drug dealers after they are caught.

Put these words upon his tomb,

"Taxes drove me to my doom!"

And when he's gone, we won't relax,

We'll still be after the inheritance tax

Until government at all levels learns to get by on a bare minimum, and we learn to demand less from it, taxes, by whatever name, will be a way of life.