Who cries for the children?

One of the questions asked often in today's society is "What's wrong with the kids of today?" Well, it's the same thing that has always been wrong with kids, there are just more of them now. They've had poor socialization, improper role modeling by parents and significant others, low expectations, too much freedom and many other things I'm going to address in today's column.

We are what we learn

I know of no plainer way to say this. We can only be what we're exposed to. We can only learn what's taught to us. That's why a child's norms, values, and morals most usually mirror the norms, values, and morals of his/her parents. We don't have the ability to learn about things outside our experience. We are born without morals, a conscience, or any awareness of right and wrong. Sit two bowls of food in front of a crawling baby. Put baby food in one and rat poison in the other. Which one do you think the baby will eat?

The baby will crawl to either the nearest bowl or the bowl that is most brightly colored and eat whatever is in it. It has nothing to do with the contents of the bowl because the baby doesn't KNOW yet about the contents. That's why we have to childproof our homes. We have to cover up the electrical outlets and put all the dangerous and poisonous items out of the baby's reach because a baby will touch anything, play with anything, eat and drink anything until the baby LEARNS what the rules are. And, as already mentioned, most of this learning comes from out parents.

We live in a different world today than we did forty years ago. Forty years ago, the extended family was the rule, now it's the nuclear family. Forty years ago, someone was always home to take care of the child or welcome the child home from school, now we have an epidemic of latch-key kids who are often alone for two or three hours every afternoon until one or both parents get home from work. What can parents do to give their children the very best chance of succeeding in a world that becomes more dangerous by the day? Although the overall crime rate has slightly decreased over the last few years, the juvenile crime rate continues to increase. The experts in Juvenile Justice have researched this trend extensively and they have prepared an extensive listing of factors that puts our children at risk for juvenile delinquency. I want to mention several of them in this column because McCook and southwestern Nebraska are certainly not immune from the dangers of increased juvenile delinquency. Perhaps if parents were more aware, more delinquency could be prevented. I want to pay special attention to family risk factors and societal risk factors because these are the ones that are the easiest to remedy, if the parents are aware and if they, in fact, care.

Family risk factors

*Parent has drug or alcohol problem *Parent drinks two or more times a week

*Parental rejection

*Low presence of parents as positive role models

*Frequent parental absence

*Low parental monitoring, discipline, and supervision

*Low parental standards, values, and morals *Poor communication in family

*Easy access to guns at home

*Poor parenting skills

*Low educational achiev-ement by parents

*Low religiosity in family

*Family history of anti-social or high-risk behavior

*Physical, emotional, or psychological abuse by parent *Physical, emotional, or psychological spouse abuse witnessed or heard by children in the home

Social Risk Factors

*Friends engage in problem behavior

*Friends and/or peers in the juvenile/criminal justice system *Use of drugs or alcohol by friends

*Friends in trouble at school

*Easy access to guns through peers

*Parents and/or friends with underclass backgrounds

*Economic hardships

*Most free time is unstructured

*Child's activities revolve around hanging out or doing nothing

*Little interest or time spent in religious activities

*Children allowed to accompany parents to bars, clubs, and other places designed for adults.

There is much more to report but space will not permit it in this column. In particular, there are also personality factors, ecological factors, educational factors, behavior and lifestyle factors, and biological factors. Perhaps I can cover those factors in a subsequent column. The information presented above, as mentioned, is not guesswork. It's the result of extensive research and is presented in the text "Juvenile Justice: Policies, Programs, and Practices," 2002, by Taylor, Fritsch, and Caeti; Glencoe, McGraw-Hill Publishers.

I hope each of you with children in the home will take a hard look at these contributing factors to delinquency and do whatever you can do to eliminate as many of them in your child's life as possible.