Triumph and tragedy

The ten and a half hour drive is never something to look forward to and this one was no different. I had to delay my departure a couple of hours because of the freezing rain that had fallen here the night before so I didn't make it in until 8:30. Michael and his wife and Will and his fiancée were at their mom's house waiting for me, along with fried chicken and all the fixings. Fried chicken is popular in the South and especially popular in Arkansas thanks to Don Tyson and Tyson Foods. I hung out with Don a lot when I was an undergraduate at the University of Arkansas and Tyson Foods was only a small, regional chicken producer.

So we all sat at the bar in the kitchen and talked while I ate. When I was finished, Linda brought out her homemade red cake that she always prepares for special occasions. It's probably the best tasting cake I've ever had and this time was no different. Will blew out his candles and we all had a piece, including three of Will's friends who came down from Lincoln for his graduation.

Will attended Arkansas Tech University in Russellville and two graduations were scheduled for Saturday to accommodate all the friends and relatives of the graduates. Will's was in the morning and the field house was packed. As Will was presented his diploma, my emotions got the best of me, just like they did when Michael graduated two years before. My highest highs occur when my children succeed in life and this was one of those moments.

Unfortunately, most people, including the graduates themselves, see graduation day as something to endure rather than enjoy because on so many college campuses, graduations are designed for the Administrators, the Board of Governors, or the politicians and seldom for the students. Because of that, people are too often exposed to a windbag graduation speaker that the students couldn't care less about. Graduation day is supposed to be student centered since it's a recognition of THEIR achievements but this is usually not the case. The best graduation speaker I've heard in my 15 years at MCC was a lawyer and an MCC graduate who ended up going to prison a couple of years later. The rest were forgettable because most of them were politicians.

But ATU didn't follow the normal course because they had no graduation speaker. The President of the university recognized the faculty en masse, recognized students graduating with honors en masse and then the diplomas were presented. And instead of the graduate having to shake four or five hands, they only shook one as their picture was taken. The recessional was played as the more than 200 graduates marched out exactly 42 minutes after they marched in. This graduation really did put students first and everyone was grateful that it did.

Linda had a private room reserved at a high-end steak house in a neighboring town and ten of us had a truly enjoyable two hour experience of great food, adult beverages, funny jokes and group camaraderie.

As we were driving back home, I thought about Michael graduating from college two years earlier, getting married last summer, Will graduating from college and getting married in less than three months and realized that my job is about done.

Monday morning, I awoke to the news that the whole state of Nebraska was under a Winter Storm Watch for up to a foot of snow with bitterly cold temperatures to follow and I knew if I didn't come back home then, I might be stuck in Arkansas for a long time. I don't mean stuck in a bad way. It's just that all my "stuff" is here, the "stuff" that George Carlin used to talk about in his comedy routines and how important it is to us. Linda realized that too and even though she didn't want me to leave so soon after getting there, she understood, as did my boys.

So I headed back to Nebraska on Monday morning and had an uneventful drive until I turned north at the Grainfield exit and, because it was dark, I immediately saw red emergency lights off in the distance. As I approached them, I saw that a police car was parked parallel on the highway and a deputy sheriff was directing me to stop with his flashlight. He approached my car, asked me where I was going and when I told him McCook, he said I would have to turn around and take an alternate route because there was a serious accident blocking the roadway on up the road a mile or so. I remarked to him how terrible that was so close to Christmas and he agreed. I turned around, went back to the Interstate, exited at Highway 83 and came on home.

It wasn't until the next day that I read in this newspaper that a Kansas State co-ed from Oberlin with her whole future in front of her was killed in that accident and I couldn't help but think that if she had left a minute sooner or a minute later, it wouldn't have happened. I also thought that if I had left a few minutes earlier, it might have been me instead of her. There's no rhyme or reason to any of it. Through no fault of her own, her life was snuffed out in a heartbeat and Christmas will never be the same for those who loved her ever again, just like Thanksgiving will never be the same for my family because of Brandon's death just two days after.

Life's a crapshoot.