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Wednesday, Aug. 27, 2014

There was a Time

Posted Wednesday, February 27, 2008, at 4:56 AM

I've noticed that my name has dropped to the bottom of the blog list. That's usually my time to write a new article so I can feel like a WINNER!

"There was a time..." - If you can name the actor who said this quote you will get 1000 blog points. (Movie Reviewers at the McCook Gazette need not apply)

The real problem with writing entertaining (somewhat) blog articles about a culture that shocks you is that after living here for a certain length of time you forget what shocked you to begin with. There was a time that everything shocked me and I'd sit in my cold apartment shivering with spite and yet now I'm reveling in it. I believe ShawShank Redemption called it being institutionalized. That's a strange way to put it because it sounds as if I should be in a nut house..heh..oh God. *Commence putting head in lap and crying.*

My true purpose as a blog writer is to give you a real picture of what China is like. Most people don't realize that Asia has separate countries but rather that it's just some big conglomerate company that churns out Tonka toys after the kids get out of preschool. Japan, maybe. I think they were in a war or something... (probably just to get noticed by US, silly kids!)

Truth be told, there is an entire other side to this culture that you just can't know from the movies. Not every Chinese person knows Kung fu, although I can go to the nearest park and practice If I like. Only old people oddly enough. I once sat and watched them and they invited me to join but I didn't think my tubby body could "flow like water." An air bubble, maybe.

That's truly the hardest part about the entire experience is living in a surreal world where I can actually *practice* Kung fu with an old Chinese martial arts master while living in the practical world and realizing that I will never be the next Bruce Lee.

You meet the most interesting people in China. Kevin, a local teacher who has lived here for 6 years and miraculously speaks next to no Chinese is nearly a Kung Fu master. He's been training in the mysterious art of Tai Chi - IT'S REAL! I thought it was just something Chris Tucker made up! - for 13 years. In fact, he's to the point where he can't even find another teacher because he's THAT good.

The shocker is: He's British. I'll wait for you to sit down. Go ahead. Apparently this is the true reason he came to China despite being here for 6 years, marrying and having a baby last year. His martial arts teacher was from China, but had moved to England to find a better life. Kevin found him after he had trained in Tae Kwon Do and became the diligent student...like in Karate Kid. After he finished his training with his master, his master urged him to go to the mother land to learn the art first hand. Everyone knows it, and they're amazing.

The problem came up when he got here and no one knew more than he did. Final Score: Kevin - 1. Chinese dignity - 0. And this is where we are now. However, Kevin still gets up at 4 in the frickin' morning to train in Tai Chi at the local park. I've asked if I can train with him but I'm not a morning person.

Showing comments in chronological order
[Show most recent comments first]

Easy...Bruce Willis...

Lucky Number Slevin...

I shall be expecting those blog points within 24 hours of this posting...

-- Posted by Hoffman on Wed, Feb 27, 2008, at 6:38 AM

One of the biggest culture shocks for me when I first went to the Orient was my perception of how short the people were. Being over 6 feet tall in a land of 5 footers made me feel like I stood out like a sore thumb.

-- Posted by Brian Hoag on Wed, Feb 27, 2008, at 8:21 AM

You mean I can't get 1000 blog points?

If Hoffman can get them, why can't I?

Seriously, great blog. Love reading it.

-- Posted by brokenblade on Wed, Feb 27, 2008, at 8:35 AM

I didn't expect such astute people to read my blog so quickly. Beaten before the 5 hour mark. Curses!

-- Posted by natejames on Wed, Feb 27, 2008, at 9:13 AM

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