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Morons - Of The Oxy Variety

Posted Thursday, May 7, 2009, at 2:26 PM

Truth In Advertising?
I imagine all of us have used an oxymoron, and some of us use them all the time. If you don't recall the term...

oxymoron - a figure of speech that combines two or more normally contradictory terms.

OK, with the definition in mind here are some of my favorite examples...

Sweet Sorrow

Deafening Silence

Plastic Glass

Same Difference

Organized Mess

Controlled Chaos

Open secret


Military Intellegence

Clean Coal

Affordable Luxury

So today, I want to talk about affordable luxury. What would you describe as affordable luxury? I suppose that the luxury part of the "o" moron should mean something very nice such as an expensve car, a big fancy house, fine jewelery, or a host of things that cost a bunch of dough.

What about the "affordable" part of the oxymoron? That would imply that you can pay for the luxury right? So based on that, if you have a lot of money, and the thing you want costs a lot and you buy it anyway, then it's an affordable luxury... at least that kinda makes sense to me.

What makes affordable luxury amusing to me is the last time I saw and experienced it. Margie and I were heading to Washington state to see my mother, and we stopped in Ontario Oregon to find a motel. Shortly after we pulled off the Interstate, we spot a big sign...


Colonial Inns

High Speed Internet

I admit that the place looked pretty nice. Since we travel with our dog, we try and find places with a separate entrance for each room as it's easier to walk Casey. Additionally, for some reason, we have never figured out how to pack so we don't need to unload almost the whole car, so those separate doors always look good to us as we can park near the door to unload the car. Keeping up on email and such is important to us too, so the internet access sounded perfect.

While we were not looking for the luxury part of sign we noticed, we were interested in the affordable aspect, and after speaking to the motel office, we checked in for the night.

Our room was plenty nice, and I would go so far as to recommend the place, but I think their sign needs to change because I got little luxury out of my affordable night at the motel with the "Affordable Luxury" sign out front.

The night started out great! We had a very quiet room (more on this shortly) at the end of the building and two very comfortable king size beds. A large screen TV was in the room with refergerator, and microwave oven. Not bad I think as I reach for the soon to be discovered NON WORKING TV remote control. Still, I'm not bothered a bit... I know how to get up off my butt and change the channel.

Where the problem came was really from the parking lot. For whatever reason, an 18 wheeler convention conveined outside our motel door around midnight. First we got to listen to the rigs pull in, set their brakes, slam their doors, yell and holler at each other on their way to the office, and then reverse their course as they were not parked in the proper place I guess as they all started back up and moved to the place I saw them in the morning.

Not long after that, we hear another bunch of noise outside our door... turns out a bus had unloaded and the passengers got to pass our doorway on the way to their rooms.

So all in all, our affordable luxury amounted to a pretty standard motel room with good beds, little sound deading material in the walls, feeling like I was parked in a truck travel plaza, and the final insult of finding out I was actually sleeping in the bus terminal. Oh yeah... the high speed internet promised on the sign didn't work in the room we were in either.

Which brings me to the point of todays blog... I guess I need to be more careful about oxymorons and advertising in the future.

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Thanks Arley! I have a very good friend that is nearly deaf but hears pretty well with help of hearing aids. He always says that noise at night is not problem for him either... he just turns off the switch.

-- Posted by Brian Hoag on Thu, May 7, 2009, at 10:28 PM

Too bad you do not sleep like I do. Even 'ZZZZZ' can't wake me up. Mega Thunder, like a week or so ago, Maybe. Eat your heart out Brian. Ha. Glad you had a good safe trip.

In His Shalom. Arley

-- Posted by Navyblue on Thu, May 7, 2009, at 6:37 PM

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